Habit over Heart

I think it worth noting that our attitudes toward others are more shaped by our habitual actions than our actions are determined by our attitudes. We can conform our behavior to personal and social standards regardless of our attitudes. And as we do our attitudes will change, shaped to conform to the social and personal habits we are creating. 

The great myth of the revivalist Christianity that shapes so much of American culture is that you need an emotional or intellectual conversion before you can be a better person and have a better society. In reality you/we just need to start behaving differently in a systematic fashion. 

This is why opposition to standards of speech and behavior that are exclusionary, misogynist, racist, and etc. in the name of freedom actually supports the perpetuation of exclusion, racism, misogyny, and etc. 

Long history demonstrates that a state which restricts by law self-expression becomes totalitarian and anti-human. Long history also shows that a society that tolerates public and even private expressions of visceral fear and hatred toward others invariably sees those fears and hatreds solidified in public and private behavior which reinforces and perpetuates them. 

The heart is rarely under our rational control; the hands, feet, and tongue almost always. Christians need to convert their hands and feet and tongues. The heart will follow.